There are plenty of beauty ideals evident in our world today, some good and some bad. When you have daughters, it can be hard to make sure they grow up with more of the positive than the negative. As the mom of boys I’m tasked with teaching my sons how to recognize positive beauty ideals and build them up in the women they choose someday. Here are some good ones to instill in your daughter.
A healthy and well-balanced diet is great for all aspects of appearance. The right foods can give you shiny, lustrous hair, strong muscles and supple skin. Therefore, healthy eating is one of the beauty ideals your daughter needs to see from you. That means choosing nutrient dense foods most of the time, but also allowing for treats now and then. Your daughter will pick up the way you eat, so make sure you’re setting a good example.
I’m not only referring to the guts it takes to talk to someone new or to put yourself out there for a promotion at work. I’m talking about body confidence. If you praise your body for all that it does for you, your daughter will follow suit. On the other hand, if you say negative and nasty things about your looks, your daughter will probably find her own flaws. Flaunt what you’ve got and keep quiet about what you don’t like.
It’s important to emphasize to your daughter that size doesn’t determine beauty. This is a tough one because society regularly bombards girls with how they “should” look. You can get around this by commenting on what makes any woman beautiful, whether it’s her long hair or her strong shoulders. No matter her size, this teaches your daughter to see beauty in everyone, large or small.
While it’s not a good idea to make snarky comments about how other women look because your daughter may do the same, you should instill in her a healthy sense of her own personal care. Model proper tooth brushing, washing your hair, wearing deodorant and other aspects of personal care so she learns to take pride in how she looks (and smells) so she can feel good about herself.
Your daughter will look to you from the beginning to recognize her beauty and build her self-esteem. As she gets older, others will try to tear that down, but by building a solid foundation for her, she can get through those instances with her confidence intact. Tell your daughter she’s beautiful and comment on her physical attributes. At the same time, make a point to play up her intelligence, sports abilities and musical talents too, so she doesn’t think that beauty is all she has.
In a world where a toddler can walk around with a pair of pants that spell “Juicy” across the butt, it might not be that easy to find or convince your daughter to wear appropriate clothing. Teach her how to dress to play up her best features and send the message that she wants the world to see. That means no tight, too short or too low-cut items that say the wrong thing. You can do this best by dressing appropriately yourself as well as talking about the topic when it comes up.
Imagine how boring the world would be if we all looked the same. Try telling that to a junior high girl though. All she wants to do is conform. It’s vital to show your daughter that being different is good. No one is the same and it’s OK to display her interests and passions no matter what anyone says. She’ll come to this realization on her own someday, but for now it’s your job to make sure she knows how awesome her differences make her.
Do you have a daughter? How do you make sure she has the confidence and self-esteem to get her through?